Are you caring for someone who is living with an eating disorder?

Supporting someone you care about

If you’re supporting someone with an eating disorder, you may feel helpless, frustrated, or frightened. You might find yourself saying or doing things out of desperation — simply wanting them to be okay.

Janet Treasure uses animal metaphors to describe common (and very understandable) caring responses.

Two that can be particularly unhelpful are:

• The Rhino — pushing, confronting, charging forward

• The Ostrich — avoiding, minimising, or hoping it will resolve on its own

Both come from care, but both can increase fear or resistance.

More helpful styles tend to be:

• The Dolphin — curious, collaborative, encouraging

• The St Bernard — calm, steady, reassuring, present

  
  

You don’t need to say the perfect thing. Often, what helps most is staying connected, regulated, and compassionate — even when it’s hard.